Posted in Blog

“Hope You Get Better Soon”

Get-well-soon
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It’s funny how whenever I have a seizure most people will respond with:

hope you get better soon.

Although I appreciate the sentiment behind it, I feel like there’s so much to unpack in that statement; what does “getting better” even mean? To me, when you have a chronic illness there is no “getting better” (in the way society expects you to, such as able, fit, full health); it’s not like having a cold, you take a few drugs, drink some Lemsip and in a few days you’re back to what society deems as normal, “better” and back to full health again.

There’s also no certainty that my seizures will become controlled under medication and even if they do, I’ll be on medication for the rest of my life. Is that normal? Is that feeling better, considering the side-effects we experience while on medication?

And what about mental health? Again, when you have mental ill-health, can you ever get back to “normal”? You can restore your mental wellbeing, however along with the stigma of mental ill-health and diagnosis, along with what particular disorder you might have – such as schizophrenia, you might never be deemed normal by society again?

At times I question the sincerity behind the phrase “hope you get better soon”. If it’s a really good friend or a supporting family member, who understands your condition then they just might want you to recover from the seizure and be able to function a little bit better. But others can use the phrase to be dismissive of your condition, especially when you’ve told them that you’ve had a seizure and instead of asking how you’re feeling, they just respond with “hope you get better soon”. See what I mean?

Just a thought.

Sometimes we need to pay attention to the words we’re using and how they might be construed by the person hearing them.

XOXO

Author:

I’m Cece Alexandra and I have Epilepsy. Since being diagnosed, my life has changed significantly. After studying and teaching Humanities and Literature for all of my adult life, I was bullied and lost my job a month before qualifying to become an English Teacher. Once you fail the Teacher Training course in England, you cannot ever retrain; I then became too sick to work because of my Epilepsy. I am now currently studying an MSc in Mental Health Psychology with the University of Liverpool. My disability provokes me into raising awareness for invisible disabilities, which I also actively partake in with Epilepsy Action. Part of that awareness is to help fight against invisible disability discrimination - I believe that this behaviour is not cognitively unconscious; modern society is actively partaking in a hierarchy of disabilities and I believe that there is not enough psychological research to prove this. I am also clinically interested in Cultural Psychology - particularly Collectivist Culture, and wish to pursue this further in my academic career.

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