Posted in Blog

What’s With Lore???

I’ve had an extremely exhausting week emotionally, as well as mentally and apart from working on a project for uni I’ve completely shut myself off from the rest of the world.

My partner and I almost broke up this week because it’s been a struggle.


I’m currently watching the TV series “Lore” on Amazon Prime and I’m on the second episode about lobotomies. I’m so mortified, I had to take a break to come and to the toilet and be sick halfway through. An ice pick in the eyes??? Why do movies and old skool cartoons pretend that it’s some kind of brain swap, or brain on the shelf thing, when it was actually even worse than that?


And why is mental health still something that is so misunderstood even now? The narrator was exclusively talking about the brain, when mental health is about the mind too. It’s like a battle of the two. Sometimes that’s the problem.


And with the way the system works now, dishing out anti-depressants is almost like being lobotomised in a way…


My main issues this week are to do with being so poorly let down and I’m beginning to want to live an apathetic life, which is in contrast to my personality, but I’m exhausted. I’m a minority in every single sense with nobody standing up for me.


I try to be grateful for what I have, but let’s be real:

I started off the year with a career, money, independence, friends, prospects, goals..

Now, I may have goals, but I don’t have anything else, apart from love.


My friends all got tired and deserted me because depression is boring (including the ones from a recent post. These recent weeks have been a burden to them).

And the rest you already know about.  


Anyway, I’m going to go back and watch “Lore”.

Perhaps an old skool cartoon lobotomy would be a good idea, to feel apathetic and not feel guilty about it either…🤔

Author:

I’m Cece Alexandra and I have Epilepsy. Since being diagnosed, my life has changed significantly. After studying and teaching Humanities and Literature for all of my adult life, I was bullied and lost my job a month before qualifying to become an English Teacher. Once you fail the Teacher Training course in England, you cannot ever retrain; I then became too sick to work because of my Epilepsy. I am now currently studying an MSc in Mental Health Psychology with the University of Liverpool. My disability provokes me into raising awareness for invisible disabilities, which I also actively partake in with Epilepsy Action. Part of that awareness is to help fight against invisible disability discrimination - I believe that this behaviour is not cognitively unconscious; modern society is actively partaking in a hierarchy of disabilities and I believe that there is not enough psychological research to prove this. I am also clinically interested in Cultural Psychology - particularly Collectivist Culture, and wish to pursue this further in my academic career.

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