Posted in Blog

More Epilepsy and Periods

Following my last post I’ve had mixed reviews.

Most have been fantastic!

“It’s your body! Your choice! Wooooo!”

However, I was surprised by a couple of women who were very dismissive of my post. These women also have Epilepsy, which is why I was all the more surprised and now I feel like I have to justify myself:

 

  1. My periods destroy me. I work in a job where I cannot afford to be sick – not just because of the economic climate we live in, but because my absence affects the people I work with, and the people I work for. My periods have a direct effect upon my Epilepsy: they cause me extra anxiety, severe pain, loss of appetite and nausea/ vomiting, dehydration, tiredness – all things which trigger seizures anyway. However, they also cause disruption to my sleep which also triggers seizures.
  2. A hysterectomy may not put an end to my seizures completely because I’m NOT claiming to have catamenial Epilepsy (as somebody thought that i was). I just want to do something to help so this from happening to me.

 

Finally, my boyfriend (who will kill me for sharing this but this is the price you pay for dating a blogger biatch) was afraid that I came across as sounding very Nazist when it sounded like I was dictating who and who shouldn’t have children.

Let me make this clear: this blog is not a place for propaganda. However, I stand by my words when I say that my parents were fucked up and fucked up big time by having a family.

 

I don’t know where my Epilepsy comes from, however there is a chance that it could be hereditary because my uncle has had tonic clonic seizures while under major life stresses. I couldn’t live with myself knowing that I had passed this disease on to my own child(ren).

 

There is a chance that it isn’t hereditary though. How knows with this stupid mysterious illness?

 

Going back to seizures during your period, they really are the worst: I feel like I’ve lost a week of my life to nothingness. Apart from that one day I had off, I managed to make it into work however I made so many mistakes my existence felt pointless.

I do realise that I am being hard on myself.

And there could be other options.

Perhaps I’m being too manically decisive….

 

… And this is probably another reason why I shouldn’t have any children lol…

 

 

Author:

My body remains on the sidelines watching, while my mind roams around the room, taking in the world around her. I am a wallflower. There could be two reasons for this: It could be due to me being an introvert or just that I am a Cancerian! I’m Cece Alexandra and I am so honoured that you’ve been led to delve into my thoughts here in this blog! I would describe myself as a Wallflower which is why I use words to express my deepest – and sometimes darkest - thoughts. Words have always been my strongest method of expressing myself. Growing up I always wanted to be a writer, however life and circumstances chipped away at my confidence until there was nothing left. Without words, I could no longer express myself. I am also Epileptic. Since being diagnosed, I have realised that my deepest fear is the day I am finally on my deathbed, haunted by the overwhelming regret that I never achieved my God-given potential. This realisation forced me to take a step of faith and put myself out there. Yes it makes me vulnerable, however within the process I not only want to be an inspiration to myself; I want to be an inspiration to other women – to be whatever you want to be. Embrace the fear and doubt and utilise that as the fuel you need to push through! Life is for living to the fullest. Life is for loving, for living true to yourself and to the people around you. Life however, can also be crippling, dark and overwhelming. But you are not alone. This thought alone is what will help you get up from the ground.

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