Posted in Blog

Zonegran: The Bee’s Knees

For the first time in forever I feel alive.

I’m not 12 days into my Zonegran journey and also TWELVE DAYS SEIZURE FREE.

It’s a fucking miracle.

And not only that:  but being alive AND AWAKE, sounds like a bizarre thing to be thankful for, however I truly am; to be able to focus while somebody talks to me and also remember the majority of our conversation; to wake up and not feel more physically and mentally exhausted than I was before I went to sleep but actually feel recharged like one should after sleeping; to be able to walk comfortably from one place to another.

And Alas! Last weekend my boyfriend and I went to IKEA and I was able to run around and lift things up!

I cannot believe that this could be my drug.

I’m fearful in getting my hopes up too much, however… I’ve always been a hopeless romantic and a daydream believer meaning that I’m prone to throwing myself into the ocean.iancurtis01getty88429765_160180-hero_-1

I’m actually listening to Joy Division while I write this… I still remember watching their music videos and thinking I looked like Ian Curtis. When I read Touching From A Distance, I was all the more certain that I was just like him regardless of how much people continued to dismiss me. He probably saved my life……

Author:

I’m Cece Alexandra and I have Epilepsy. Since being diagnosed, my life has changed significantly. After studying and teaching Humanities and Literature for all of my adult life, I was bullied and lost my job a month before qualifying to become an English Teacher. Once you fail the Teacher Training course in England, you cannot ever retrain; I then became too sick to work because of my Epilepsy. I am now currently studying an MSc in Mental Health Psychology with the University of Liverpool. My disability provokes me into raising awareness for invisible disabilities, which I also actively partake in with Epilepsy Action. Part of that awareness is to help fight against invisible disability discrimination - I believe that this behaviour is not cognitively unconscious; modern society is actively partaking in a hierarchy of disabilities and I believe that there is not enough psychological research to prove this. I am also clinically interested in Cultural Psychology - particularly Collectivist Culture, and wish to pursue this further in my academic career.

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